The "one"

I honestly feel like i found the "one" and i let him go... and i cant go back not agian... idk what to do or who to tell or anything... i take back everything.. i want our families issues to go away and i want us agian... and i cant believe i just said that! my heart is sooooooooooooooooo confused right now.. just when i think i could fall for someone else my feelings are still way too strong to do anything about it... i wanna go away and meet someone who will make me happy and have a good family life but i cant just leave... and no one here can do that to the standard i need. i cant stand this pain.... no no no no no no no no i cant even think about kissing or hugging or fallin for him agin... i cant handle this... i feel like later in life im going to regret letting you go.. i feel like this may be the reason y i cant completely forget about you. i never will be able to either hes my first love my first everything (for the most part) and i still see a future with him.. he dosent force me he never would and we rly where almost perfect for each other... but the treatment wasnt right.. and we had to force and sneek everything... i want to kno how he still feels and if he felt this too...